Even the chummiest co-founders are susceptible to a professional falling out. In fact, we’d argue that best friends in business are most prone to fighting.
Is it natural? Yes, there’s money, pride and success on the line. Is it conducive to a strong, efficient and enduring business? Probably not.
In fact, according to Harvard Business School professor Noam Wasserman, 65 percent of startups fail due to co-founder conflict. We don’t like the looks of those odds.
But still, it’s likely you and your co-founder will get into a tussle if you haven’t already. Here are our best tips for weathering the storm and coming out stronger on the other side.
Start-ups thrive on passion. Our research shows successful early-stage founders have up to 21 percent more motivation to get things started. That’s motivation to deal with late-night product launches, stakeholder meetings and difficult clients, while continuing to push to achieve a goal.
When you’re putting in so much passion, it’s only natural that you’ll stand up for what you believe is the right way of doing things. In this way, conflict is a sign that you and your co-founder want what’s best for the business.
“It means people care about outcomes, and conflict is far better than apathy,” says the chairman of JetBlue Airways, Joel Peterson. “So, fostering a culture in which conflict is processed openly is as vital as any habit in the creation of a high-trust culture.
Trust is a big one. Again, you need to remind yourself that your co-founder has also invested a huge deal into this venture, so you need to have faith that their judgments are based on what they think will gain success – even if you disagree with them.
The Techstars blog also makes this very good point:
“You should trust your cofounder to make the decision in the domain in which they are an expert.”
If it’s not in your domain, this might mean eating some humble pie and letting them take the reigns on this one. The ultimate act of trust is letting go of control – just a little!
Do you find it difficult to understand where your co-founder is coming from? Is your co-founder often offended by your interactions, even when you don’t bear any animosity?
Emotional intelligence can’t be undervalued in a business setting. With so much riding on venture success, tensions are often high and one misjudged exchange can snowball into warfare.
Try and have empathy for your co-founder’s wants and needs. Also be mindful of your affective communication, including body language and expressions, when dealing with sensitive situations. A smile goes a long way.
It is important that, throughout even the biggest disagreements, you and your co-founder are aligned with your business goals towards success. Make sure this is outlined in a strategy (and we find big posters on the wall do the trick, too).
What you NEVER want to do is make the disagreement personal. If you feel you cannot resolve it peacefully, this may be a good time to bring in a third-party consultant to save your business (and possibly your friendship).
We’re all different. Once we recognize and embrace this instead of fighting it, business relationships can be truly empowered.
Take this case study at Investible Lab. Two co-founders, despite sharing intelligence and passion, could not stop fighting. That’s when Annie Luu, one of the key leaders at Investible had them complete the F4S assessment.
The findings? Co-founder One had a high motivation for affective communication, while co-founder two preferred neutral communication (content over tone). As they couldn’t relate to each other, fighting was inevitable.
Luu helped the co-founders become aware of their different needs and received language coaching. A year later, their business had gone from strength to strength, even expanding to overseas.
Our programs were designed by world-renown coaches, and sessions only take 5-15 minutes. Get started for free with personalized program now by chatting in the box below:
Our expert coaches have designed hyper-effective programs that will help
overcome co-founder conflict.
Coach Marlee (your amazing AI-powered personal coach) will analyse your unique traits and goals to let you know which program to start with (and if there are any you should skip)!
Your recommended programs include:
Reduce conflict and enhance your relationships by trusting the experience and genius within your co-founder. During this eight week program Coach Marlee will help you to develop a genuine appreciation for experimentation and data and a willingness to empower the opinions, feedback and insights of others in your team and life.
In this high impact nine week program Coach Marlee will help you build the foundations for general wellbeing while also helping you to break through self sabotage to develop life long skills for managing personal boundaries and emotional resilience, all crucial skills for managing conflict and happy healthy relationships. Enjoy weekly cutting edge science backed wellbeing resources from both Marlee and our wellbeing partner Blisspot.
“I love how practical this coaching is!”
“Our fast-paced society pushes us to neglect our very human need to take a moment to pause and reflect. Marlee helped me get back in touch with that, and it has done wonders for my mental health!”
“Wow this program has totally changed my relationship to goals! Thanks so much Marlee, I miss you already”
“As an engineer, I never thought about doing a retro with my family. This has been cool.”
“What profound and exciting coaching. Brilliant!”
"Wow this program has totally changed my relationship to goals! Thanks so much Marlee, I miss you already"
"This program has helped me to be less impulsive and really think before acting"
“Always thought-provoking and well worth my time”